dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize