And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
