You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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