real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
