Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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