Your tits are I can't wait for
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
