his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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