So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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