she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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