what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I would fuck him just for his dog
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
