You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
