I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I look better un-naked...
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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