I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Randomize
