I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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