went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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