I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize