I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Randomize