just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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