I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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