its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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