Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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