That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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