you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize
