I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize