stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
