nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
