Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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