i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
