If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize