She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
