I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
i would one night stand the shit outta him
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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