Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Sorry about my life...
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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