that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
I'm just crazy horny about you
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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