Me too!
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
