I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
