Don't make out with my wife yet
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
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