She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
