i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
