Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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