I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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