Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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