Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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