So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
