I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
