You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
