I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
