help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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