I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Randomize
