He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
is it fun? or sober?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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