How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
