using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Found your dick twin last night
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Randomize